How to Conduct Successful One-on-One Meetings: A Guide for New Managers and People Leaders
Effective one-on-one meetings are key for new managers. Focus on the employee, listen, and ask meaningful questions like "What's on your mind?" Preparation and follow-up make these meetings truly impactful.
As a newly minted manager or people leader, one of the most critical skills you must master is conducting effective one-on-one meetings. Unfortunately, this isn’t something taught in most business programs. Managing people, especially in today’s fast-paced business environments, requires a nuanced approach that many new leaders aren’t prepared for. Too often, leaders fall into the trap of making these meetings informal chit-chat sessions—discussing the weather or weekend plans—and when challenges arise, they realize they haven’t built meaningful dialogue with their team members.
The question is, how can you ensure that your one-on-one meetings are effective, productive, and, most importantly, focused on the growth and engagement of your team members? Here’s a framework to help you get started.
Why One-on-One Meetings Matter
Effective one-on-one meetings are essential for several reasons:
- Gauge employee engagement: Regular, structured conversations help you understand how engaged your team members are.
- Measure performance incrementally: You can identify successes or issues before they become overwhelming.
- Course-correct quickly: When challenges arise, you can address them early and avoid them escalating.
In essence, one-on-one meetings are about the other person—not you. As a leader, you’re there to listen, coach, and support, not dominate the conversation. So how can you lead them effectively?
Step 1: Shift the Focus to the Other Person
One of the most common mistakes new leaders make is making one-on-ones about their own goals or agendas. The focus should always be on the other person. This is your chance to put on your coaching hat. Michael Bungay Stanier, in his book The Coaching Habit: Say Less, Ask More & Change the Way You Lead Forever, suggests starting every meeting with a simple yet powerful question: “What’s on your mind?”
This open-ended question gives your team members the space to bring up what’s most pressing for them, whether it’s a challenge, a new idea, or a concern they’ve been wrestling with. It sets the tone for a meaningful conversation rather than a superficial check-in.
Step 2: Start with Progress and Change
If you’ve implemented Objectives and Key Results (OKRs) or any form of goal-setting with your team, begin by asking: “What’s changed since the last time we met?”
This question grounds the conversation in measurable progress and focuses on the time since your last meeting. By doing this, you’re not only tracking the individual’s work but also fostering accountability. It also encourages reflection, which helps team members think critically about their progress and identify areas where they need support.
Step 3: Dive Deeper with Specific Questions
Once you’ve covered updates and progress, you can go broader. Ask more in-depth questions about challenges and opportunities: “What challenges are you facing right now?” or “What opportunities do you see on the horizon?” These questions open the door to discussing roadblocks, areas of uncertainty, and personal development goals.
Step 4: Prepare and Circulate Your Questions in Advance
Preparation is key. Don’t show up to the meeting expecting everything to flow naturally. Instead, prepare a few specific questions and share them with your team member in advance. This gives them time to think about their responses and ensures that both of you come prepared. You might want to include a mix of performance-related questions and broader, personal-development-focused ones.
Here’s an example of a few key questions:
- “What are you most proud of achieving since our last meeting?”
- “What’s one thing you’ve struggled with, and how can I support you?”
- “Are there any resources or tools you need to be more effective?”
Step 5: Pay Attention to Body Language and Engagement
Listening isn’t just about the words someone says. Pay close attention to body language, tone of voice, and energy levels. Is the person engaged? Are they leaning forward and speaking with enthusiasm, or do they seem disengaged or distracted? These non-verbal cues can tell you a lot about how the person is really feeling, even if they don’t say it outright.
Step 6: Ask for Feedback on Your Leadership
Don’t shy away from asking: “How can I show up better for you?” or “What do you need from me as a leader?”
These questions demonstrate humility and a willingness to grow. It also opens the door for your team members to provide feedback on how you can support them more effectively. Being transparent about your own development as a leader fosters trust and strengthens your relationship with your team.
Step 7: Keep it Brief but Meaningful
A good one-on-one meeting shouldn’t take more than 50 minutes. Any longer, and you risk losing focus. You want these meetings to be tight, intentional, and productive. Set a clear agenda ahead of time, stick to it, and respect the other person’s time.
Step 8: Take Notes and Follow-Up
Don’t just have the meeting and move on—take notes during or right after your conversation, and always follow up on action items. If you’ve committed to helping with a specific task or providing a resource, make sure you deliver. Keeping track of these commitments shows your team that you take their needs seriously.
Conclusion
One-on-one meetings are a critical tool in your leadership arsenal, but they must be intentional. By focusing on your team members, preparing in advance, asking meaningful questions, and following up on commitments, you can make your one-on-ones an essential part of your leadership toolkit. Remember, it’s not about you—it’s about helping your team grow, thrive, and succeed. Start today by asking: “What’s on your mind?” and watch your one-on-ones become more impactful.